So, when is Halloween this year?

Here's a news flash:

Halloween will be celebrated on Oct. 31.

That's right! The happy celebration of childhood greed 'n' gluttony will be observed Oct. 31.

Isn't that the day it's always observed? Isn't Halloween sort of like Christmas, which falls on Dec. 25? Or Independence Day, on July 4?

Yes, indeed. But that wasn't the case a few years ago, when the Columbia County Commission flipped its helpful-nanny switch. In 1999 Halloween fell on a Sunday, so commissioners decreed trick-or-treating would be moved to Saturday to avoid a conflict between church and fake paganism.

Different attitudes ruled the day last year, however, when Halloween again fell on a Sunday. Commissioners wisely stayed out of it, children merrily trick-or-treated in the afternoon, and all was right with the world.

So this year, Halloween is on a Monday. It ought not be an issue at all, right?

Wrong. It seems that the one-time move of Halloween has awakened in some Columbia County citizens the notion that an omniscient county government - even one without consolidation! - can shift holidays at will.

As a result, Emergency Services Director Pam Tucker reports that the county's information line has been receiving calls from citizens asking, "When is Halloween?" The general idea seems to be that trick-or-treating on a school night is inconvenient, so the holiday should be moved.

To Sunday.