True love and the remote control

Last month Jay and I celebrated our 38th wedding anniversary. That's quite

an accomplishment in this day and age, wouldn't you say?

In combination with Valentine's Day, it was a very romantic month for me.

Well, a little romantic. All right, I got two cards, one present and a

little ditty composed by my loving husband. Wanna hear it?

Happy Birthday to you!

You're like an old Shoe!

You're worn out and smelly,

But I still love you!

OK, I can read your minds. "She just made that up to get a few laughs!"

Think what you will, but I assure you those are the exact words that came

from his mouth, while sitting in his recliner with boxer shorts on, a ratty

T-shirt and the remote held firmly in his right hand to ensure he didn't

drop it - or worse, that I didn't take it away.

Jay and I have much in common. He dearly loves his golf. So do I. When he's

gone, I get to go to movies he would not consider seeing. I love the theater

but not when it comes with blood and guts or slapstick comedy only the male

species can enjoy.

Something else we have in common is our love of great TV. His favorite show

is American Choppers and any and all shows that have some type of ball used

- football, baseball, golf, NASCAR. Well, I guess that last one doesn't

involve a ball unless you consider the rocks in the driver's heads. Come on,

now; they've got to be a little crazy .

My favorite show is America Dreams, and anything that does not require a

scoreboard or round track. Know what? I just realized there's a popular TV

show based on my husband's life. Have any of you ever seen "According to

Jim"?

By now you must think I'm either married to an insensitive jerk or a moron.

Trust me, you are very wrong. Jay is neither of those. He is simply a man

who refuses to grow old and live in a world without humor. I love him for

that. There's never a dull moment at the Fickle house. We're either laughing

or fighting over the TV. In fact, the only time we ever argue is when the

remote is missing.

Did you know you cannot physically turn the TV on without this remarkable

piece of technology? Of course, we've never really gotten out of our chairs

to look for an "on" button. We just know there's not one.

(Pat Fickle is a Martinez resident.)